A little rant from a girl with road rage.
There are many things that really bloody annoy me whilst driving sometimes, and give me instant road rage. I actually enjoy driving. Like a typical woman driver stereotype, I CANNOT park for shit.. I even have a bloody rear camera AND parking sensors, and I still can’t flipping to do it! I mean.. How embarrassing is that?!
I couldn’t wait to pass my test, and when I did I insisted on driving EVERYWHERE. I was never a nervous new driver. Actually I was a cocky little shit, and so over confident. I’d be driving around at what I thought was a normal speed, look down and realise I was hitting 45mph or more! (Please don’t tell!)
I enjoyed driving and was always confident. I was SO excited about jumping in my little Clio (at the time) and driving around whilst blasting out my tunes! Especially on a sunny day with my shades on! 🙂
We ALL get a little road rage from time to time.
Here are the things that PISS ME OFF the most:
1. When you let someone go, and they don’t even bloody thank you!!
Oi wanker! Learn some F*CKING manners!
2. When the traffic lights go green and the NOBHEAD infront of you doesn’t move off for anything more than a second!
BEEEEEP!! IT’S GREEN DICKHEAD!
3. When you’re stuck behind someone who has clearly just passed their test, an elderly person, or just an UTTER IDIOT who shouldn’t be on the road. If you’re going to crawl, you might aswell get out and walk!
Move bitch, get out the way, get out the way bitch, get out the way
4. Even worse. When you’re stuck behind a learner, as they swerve about and spend an hour trying to turn a corner.
PLEASE don’t make me tailgate you! You’re barely doing 20! You can go up to 30 you know!
5. Cyclists. Hufffffff now I’ve started… Okay if you’re a cyclist listen up!
Point number 1: If you insist on acting like a car, don’t decide to go on the pavement to avoid things.
Point number 2: If the traffic lights are red, that applies to you too dickhead! You can’t just weave in and out of traffic and hope for the best.
Point number 3: You can clearly see that I’ve been trying to get round you for BLOODY AGES! For gods sake, just move over!!
Point number 4. When weaving in front of my car in traffic and decide to stop directly in front of me. PLEASE don’t sit there scratching your sweaty arse in front of me! PUT IT AWAY NOW!
Final point: Do NOT stop next to my window and look in at me, and think this makes us friends. That’s just awkward. move along please. If i’m singing like I think I’m Beyonce, I AM NOT stopping just for you.
6. When people cross the road and step out right in front of your car, without even looking to see if it’s safe. Do you want to get run over?
7. When a bus is in front of you and the children on the back seat, insist on leaning over and staring at you whilst you’re awkwardly driving behind with nowhere else to look. AWKWAAAARD!
8. When a bus pulls into a stop and indicates at the last FRICKING SECOND! How am I meant to see around you now?
9. The frantic find a parking space dash, only to find some C*NT has parked across two spaces, or just like an UTTER BELLEND!
10. When people don’t indicate. Seriously?!? Why do people choose not to indicate? It takes less than a BLOODY second! Fools! (If there’s anything to give me major road rage, then people who don’t indicate is my worst hate!)
What annoys you most when driving?
Happy driving everyone!
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